COM60: 2017 Winter Section: Reading and Homework

COM60 Homework after Class 1:

  1. Introduce yourself to 5 people.
  2. Bonus Homework: ask one or more of those people for feedback after you have been chatting for a while.

(Remember doing things that are a little outside your comfort zone helps you move those things into your comfort zone.  Introducing yourself to 5 new people is a great weekly habit.)

COM60 Reading before Class 2 (Jan 19):

Reading in “Messages” Book (Messages: The Communication Skills Book)

Pages 6 – 55  (details below)

Part I (Part 1):  Basic Skills

  • Listening(Page 5 – 23)
  • Validation Strategies (Page 24 –  34)
  • Expressing (Page 35 – 55)    (MOST IMPORTANT SECTION: Read 1st, if you don’t think you can read everything)

I find the reading goes pretty fast, if you are squeezed for time, scan the pages, looking at the headlines and bold text and get the gist of the ideas.  These are very good ideas covered in not much text so I think you’ll find the time well worth it.

In particular, I believe the Chapter 3: Expressing is the most valuable of the three section, so you may want to prioritize reading this chapter first.

COM60 Homework After Class 2:

For your homework this week, take note of the way other’s bring up issues and be mindful of the “Net” model in your own communication.  You can even practice listening to others at a cafe or lunch room.  Do you best to use the model of “naming behavior” and describing the “hidden impact” that others aren’t able to see.

COM60 Reading before Class 3 (Jan 26):

Part II (Part 2):  Advanced Skills

  • Body Language:   Page 59 – 69
  • Paralanguage and Metamessages: Page 70-80 (especially page 77: Verbal Modifiers and page 78 Coping with MetaMessages)
  • Hidden Agendas:  Page 80-89
  • Transactional Analysis: Page 90 – 103
  • Clarifying Language Page 104 – 122 (especially page 121-122 Summary chart)

(Optional: if you want to read ahead over this rainy weekend, otherwise this reading will be assigned next week)  In the HBR Book, “On Communication”:  The Power of Talk, Who Get’s Heard and Why, by Deborah Tannen.  Page 43-65.   This is an excellent article but it’s dense and takes longer to read than the Messages book pages, so only read ahead if you have the time to dedicate to reading at a slower pace.

COM60 Reading before Class 5 (Feb 9):

In the HBR Book, “On Communication”:  The Power of Talk, Who Get’s Heard and Why, by Deborah Tannen.  Page 43-65.   This is an excellent article but it’s dense and takes longer to read than the Messages book pages

Part III (Part 3): Social Skills:  Page 125-187

#9 Assertiveness Training:  (be sure to read pages 126-127 carefully)
Read carefully:  Responding to Criticism: pages 137 – 149.
#10 Fair Fighting:
#11 Validation Strategies: Read carefully: Why Does Validation Work? and Validation Strategies pages 162-172.
#12 Negotiation:  be sure to read When Your Opponent Plays Dirty page 186-187

HOMEWORK: During the reading, please make notes (In the book, a google document, or piece of paper) and bring them to class.  We’ll do an exercise in class based on the answers you provide on pages 132 and 134.

COM60 Reading before Class 6 (Feb 16):

The reading this week is entirely in the “Messages Book”:

Part IV (Part 4): Social Skills:  Page 191-220
Prejudgment
Making Contact #15 (Be sure to read this section on making conversation)   205 – 220

Part V (Part 5) Family Skills (page 223 – 281)

Be sure to pay particular attention to the Section on Expressing: 251 -255, and  255-256 on I-messages.

HOMEWORK:   Do the short exercises on Page 196 and 197;
Optional bonus homework:  Note your schemas, (page 229).

Next week’s reading will be light, so if you didn’t finish reading the Deborah Tannen article “Power of Talk”, it would be best to read that next week when the reading will be a little lighter.

COM60 Reading before Class 7 (Feb 23):

This is the final reading and completes the book!  YAY!

Part VI (Part 6) Public Skills page 285 – 341.

If you did not complete reading the Tannen article “Power of Talk” earlier, this is the week to do it!